in szn

One of the things I wish I learned earlier was the importance of being in sync with the season of life one is in. If you're trying to rush to an later season before you're ready, you'll miss out on the current one, while not fully understanding the one you're trying to get to. If you try to cling to one that's already passed, you'll miss out on both as time passes you by.

When I was younger I spent a lot of time playing games and grinding out small promotions here and there. I didn't really have particularly high ambitions about my career, and was pretty content just saving money and trying to "pay down my mortgage." I didn't realize it at the time, but this was a huge waste of time.

I had ended up trying to extend teenage and college years where my responsibilities weren't too high, and remained constrained by the mindset of "this is all that I'm capable of" that had been inculcated in me from various life experiences. Looking back at it, professionally, financially, personally – I was playing it too safe, frittering away the springtime of youth.

Moving to California put things in gear for me. I had just become a dad, I made a big move for a job, and the real world responsibilities steadily mounted. I was ready to be a company man and grind the ladder climb. I no longer had time for hobbies; when not working I had to learn how to be a parent. This worked out fairly well for me. I felt like I was in the right place, and I just needed to grind out a career and all would be well. Looking back at it, I had just slipped into the summer of my life while thinking I was in life's autumn.

The pandemic caused a huge re-evaluation with what my priorities were. I switched companies, got some experience, but ultimately wasn't getting what I wanted. I realized that if I continued like I had, I could be certain of what the result of my life would be, and I wasn't happy with what I was looking at. I had wasted a lot of time playing games, figuratively and literally, that didn't have great payoffs.

I'm still determined to find some independent existence free from direct employment. I wish I had figured out the game before piling all the responsibilities on top of my head, but the tragicomic thing is if I had never done so, I probably would never have realized what game I was playing.

Young people should take big risks - they have almost nothing to lose and can gain a lot. It's easy for them to do so, because they have an abundance of free time. The problem is young people don't realize this.

Once young people progress into adults (parents only, sorry!), they have an enormous amount to lose and are forced to manage their time strictly - spare moments should be dedicated towards health and family. If you are still thinking about "money" at this point, you're forced to be torn between these two priorities - needing to solve one so that you can be free to focus on the other.

If you want to spend time on creating a business, it's time spent away from your family, and has an uncertain outcome. Those hours 'in the lab with a pen and a pad' may end up being in vain while your children grow up.

If you want to spend time with family – your business will certainly not appear while not attending to it. You'll have the weight of inaction weighing you down.

It's a good recipe for feeling stuck.

But, here I am. Not going to give up yet.